Paul and Barbara Sanders, in their book Choosing Forgiveness, suggest several reasons
why forgiveness is so important to healthy living. (see blog 04-25-16 part I
for first reason, blog 04-26-16 part II, blog 04-27-16 for third reason)
4. Forgiveness doesn’t mean the hurt was right!
Jesus isn’t talking about cheap forgiveness. It’s not
cheap with God. God paid an infinite price to offer forgiveness to us, showing
that he refuses to minimize our debt. The king, in Jesus’ story, swallowed a
multi-million dollar debt. His willingness to forgive the debt meant that he
took the loss. Not cheap!
Forgiveness is never cheap. It always looks at
the hurt and the one who did the hurt directly and honestly. And it calls sin
for what it is. “What you did to me was wrong! Unacceptable! And you owe a debt
to me! And I have the right to demand payment!” Only realists can be forgivers.
That’s why forgiveness is so difficult and so
few do it. As the Sanders put it, forgiveness faces the pain and the struggle
of humanity. We wrestle with the hurt and with our own weaknesses. We stop
making excuses for ourselves or for others. We face our own needs and
responsibilities as well as others’. We acknowledge and feel and embrace the pain
caused to us and call it for what it is. We don’t deny it or sweep it under the
rug or pretend it never happened or simply pass it off. Impossible and
ineffective! We face it squarely and are willing to hold the debtors
responsible.
But then, as we did with our own sins and
short-comings and failures, we do with theirs – we take them to God and let
them be cancelled by God’s compassion and love. We let them go. We let go of
our demand for our right to debt payment from the ones who hurt us by giving
them to God’s compassion and love. This is forgiveness at its most expensive
and effective level. Because by doing this, we liberate ourselves from our own prison
of anger, resentment, hate, and bitterness.
No comments:
Post a Comment